Prometheus

I recently went to go see Prometheus. Now, while I have not seen any of the Alien movies, I know what happens in them and have played one of the PS2 games. Ah, the PS2...those were the days...

Anyway, back to the film. Firstly, the facehuggers? Not actual facehuggers, as portrayed in the original films, but new, weird cobra things. Also, what I have been told of the original films' suspense is completely absent from the new film. Nothing is left up to your imagination. Blood, guts, mutations (completely out of sync with the old series) and fiery deaths are vividly shown on-screen. It's violent to a gaudy, unnecessary level. No-one lives. It's annoying. By the end you're sitting in your seat thinking "I liked that guy. And that one. And those two. The only human left (there is only one) is decent, and I love the actress, but come on!"

It appears that not only are you forced to leave your squeamishness outside, you also have to leave any scientific knowledge you have, however basic, out with it. The Predators are portrayed as being an 'exact DNA match' to humans. This is completely ridiculous, and was the last of many straws for me. I can safely say that whatever film or strange sequel planned to this, if ever there is one, I shall studiously avoid it.

Michael Fassbender looks spookily like Peter O'Toole by the way. Hint: never trust robots, they're sneaky.

All in all, the bits of the film I could watch were dreadful. In a review out of 10 I'd give it...4/10. All because of Michael Fassbender and Noomi Rapace, whom I adore. They aren't good enough, however, to save a film that never should have been made.

Dabbler.